Thursday, July 5, 2018

Entering my ma’am years.

I may or may not have just turned 40.

The universe, just to emphasize that fact, has blessed me with some very 40-year-old health issues.
For the past few months I've been feeling:

- Fatigue
- Brain fog
- Stomach pain

So, I asked my doctor to have my thyroid tested and to screen for Celiac. I found out I have nodules growing on my thyroid, and that I have Celiac Disease. So, I was right, which basically means I'm a doctor now.

I'm waiting for the next step with the thyroid issues (biopsy? surgery?) and I'm reeeeeally hoping we've found the reason I'm SORRY WHAT? WHO? Where was I...

But going gluten-free has been a cinch. No more bloating. No more intestinal weirdness. No more Stiegl Radler...NO MORE STIEGL RADLER! Crap.

Another thing that happens when you're 40? You start to love gardening. You get excited about it like you did a new boyfriend when you were 19. You stare out the window at your garden, and you think passers-by won't think you're weird, but they do. They surrrre do. Because you're a lady. You're a ma'am. And you make your husband listen to your garden updates: "Oh, Phil, you should see the cucumbers, they're really coming along - and the corn! Have you seen the corn? We have corn! Isn't that a hoot? The bunny was back again today...oh, that bunny...oh, have you noticed the potatoes have purple flowers and also BLAAAAAH BLAAAH BLAH BLAH BLAH? And the blahdy-blahs are really BLAAAH BLAH, don't you think?"

But I mean, seriously, we have a miniature corn field in our backyard. It's feckin' great:

The boys are 4 and 5 now, and they are best buds. They whirl around like a tornado with each other until bath time and then we read books and they pass out, so they'll be ready to whirl around like a tornado the next day. Here's a pic of all of my specials up at my parents' cottage in Haliburton on Canada Day:

Oh! Another thing you do when you're 40 is start a music duo with your neighbour, Rob. You call yourselves The Neighbours. Stay tuned for our tunes!

Welp, it's about time for me to pass out.

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