Sunday, February 22, 2009

Book Review.

Have you read "The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne? It is a spiritual guidebook that can lead you to happiness and fulfillment, or at least cars and money.  I just finished it today, and thought I'd share some pearls of wisdom for those who haven't discovered...the secret (imagine that I just whispered that with quiet intensity).

Okay, so just to totally ruin the surprise, the "secret" that "The Secret" refers to is the law of attraction. It was, coincidentally, a secret to me that the law of attraction was, indeed, a secret. So that is the first thing I learned from this book. 

"The Secret" claims that everything in your life has been attracted by you, and that if you're focusing on what you don't want, you will attract more of it because the Universe, apparently, can't tell whether you really want something or really don't want it. The idea is that instead of saying, "Wow, this DEBT tooootally sucks, I wish this DEBT would go away" you should be more like, "I am sooooo RICH, and being RICH is awesome" and then you will get cheques in the mail.

But aside from the book's focus on material gain, I really enjoyed the section on weight loss. Here are some quotes that will help you with your weight-loss plan:

Whether people have been told they have a slow thyroid, a slow metabolism, or their body size is hereditary, these are all disguises for thinking "fat thoughts". If you accept any of those conditions as applicable to you, and you believe it, it must become your experience, and you will continue to attract being overweight." (p. 58)

Food cannot cause you to put on weight unless you think it can. (p. 59)

Don't buy clothes at your current weight. Have faith and focus on the clothes you are going to buy." (p. 60)

Make it your intention to look for, admire, and inwardly praise people with your idea of perfect-weight bodies. Seek them out and as you admire them and feel the feelings of that - you are summoning it to you. If you see people who are overweight, do not observe them, but immediately switch your mind to the picture of you in your perfect body and FEEL it. (p. 61)

The above claims may sound crazy, but that's just because they are. Don't buy clothes that fit, fatty! Punish yourself until you are the ideal weight! Oh, and TURN AWAY from overweight people lest you should starting thinking fat thoughts! 

Really? Seriously? I watched part of the documentary of "The Secret" and almost started to like Rhonda Byrne (ONLY because of her charming Aussie accent) but then realized the documentary is even more annoying than the book.

I give "The Secret" a TOTALLY LAME out of 10.

Monday, February 16, 2009

You don't know the half of what I'm doing in Peterborough right now.

I have a cue-to-cue rehearsal today for You Don't Know the Half of It, which will run the 18th-21st in Peterborough. Things that You Don't Know about the show:

1) My character gets made fun of several times for dressing like a hippie. 
2) The man who is playing the archdeacon is an actual, real archdeacon. But I am not actually a hippie.
3) There is a pay-what-you-can on Saturday at 2pm.
4) By using the letters in the play's title you can also spell: "we think you do not float" but you would end up with an extra "h" and "f".
5) I do not know half of the lines in the show by memory, but luckily I do know my own.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Ohhhh, it's art! Right, I forgot about art.

Something happened today that I think should be turned into a New Yorker cartoon.

I was looking at my friend Susan's laptop and noticed the Google Earth map she had posted as her desktop background. I said, "That's neat, what is that a map of?" and she replied, "That's not a satellite map, it's a Jackson Pollock painting."

Here is the painting, entitled "Lavender Mist". Seriously, I swear I can see the CN tower on there...